Friday, January 30, 2009

Lesson Learned - FOLLOW YOUR INSTINCTS!

Lesson Learned - FOLLOW YOUR INSTINCTS!

SO, I know I’ve been MIA-ish. Sorry ‘bout that. For the first time since bringing them home, one of my babies is sick. And maybe two now. But not yet three. I’m holding my breath and praying.

I know I’ve mentioned puking and stuff like that before, but no-one was ever actually sick. It was more like they played too hard and got all worked up and then BARFED all over my carpet and walls and toys and themselves. You get the picture.

And anytime I was afraid that someone had a cold, it turned out to be nothing and went away as soon as it came. Allergies? Likely, since those times were around days that were very windy.

I, myself, have been really sick TWICE. Both times, we managed to keep the babies protected and they stayed healthy.

Anyway, this is the first time that I’ve actually had a sick baby. Horrible chest congestion, coughing, runny nose, sneezing, FUSSINESS…the poor thing is miserable.
I feel horrible. And I am so frustrated with myself.

As you may know, we have chosen to be RSV isolators during the RSV seasons in their first two years (maybe three) of life. Basically, what that means is once RSV season starts, we keep the babies pretty isolated, especially from anyone who’s been sick recently AND from school age kids. We are fortunate to be living in Southern California and RSV season didn’t really officially start here this year until January.

For some reason, RSV isolation is a somewhat controversial issue. People have strong opinions about the babies' immunity, which I find interesting because these are not their children. We (along with our pediatrician) believe our kids get the immunity they need from us and the people they are exposed to. Some people take our isolation personally. This frustrates me, but what can I do? We don’t isolate from everyone, just those who are in a high risk group or people whose children are school age or whose children attend group daycare…or whatever the case may be.

I could go into the whole explanation about the fact that even though they look “normal” (whatever that means), they were still 31 WEEK PREEMIES and MULTIPLES whose lungs development was not that of babies born full term and that until they are older their lungs are still more vulnerable to the dangers of respiratory illnesses for the first few of years of their lives. Bla bla bla. Oh wait, I guess I did just go into it. Nevermind. Basically, we decided that isolation during RSV season was the choice we were going to make for OUR family.

That leads me to why I am frustrated with myself: I didn’t follow my instincts. I ignored that little voice.

Last weekend there was a first birthday party for the son of a family friend. I was a little hesitant since the weather was COLD and some bad viruses have been going around. There was a recent spike in RSV activity.

I still RSVPed “yes”. I really wanted to go. The family whose baby’s birthday we were celebrating was going back to Germany where they live (they were just here to visit family/friends) and we knew our kids wouldn’t see each other for a long time. Also, we hadn’t seen some of our friends in a while (not since the Triplets’ Tol/birthday party but we didn’t get a chance to really talk to anyone) and we wanted to be normal. I wanted to be normal. Excuses aside, I knew better.

The night before the party I was really having second thoughts. My gut was bugging me. I told Brian, “Maybe we shouldn’t go. The weather is bad (it was rainy). People are sick. We are right in the middle of an RSV spike…”

But I really wanted to go. Soooo…even though my instincts told me, “NO!” I shushed them and went anyway. My justification? The party was outside. Outside is much safer than inside, right? And…they’re not newborns like last year. That’s a big difference!

We went, we had fun. It was nice visiting with friends. I loved seeing everyone and sharing our babies with family friends. I noticed a couple of sniffling coughers. I tried to ignore it. We went home and went on with the weekend.

Two days later the fussiness and coughing began. Now, I’ve got a full blown sick baby and one showing some signs of joining him (coughing has started).

Having one sick baby is hard enough. I am exhausted. But I asked for it! I have done this to myself. I have done this to my babies. Lesson learned. I am mad at myself though. I am praying that things improve quickly but they seem to be getting worse before getting better. So, I admit I am freaking out a bit. They cannot all get sick!

I am already exhausted this week from ONE sick baby.
I cannot afford three co-pays for doctor’s visit.
God forbid we end up having to do breathing treatments.
I am such an idiot.

OK, so GET OVER IT and SHUTUP and SNAP OUT OF IT. I get it. I realize that everything will be fine and its not the end of the world.

Can you tell that I am hard on myself?

Can we move on to good news? Guess who cut a tooth? Her FIRST tooth. ALEXIS!

Current tooth count:

Alexis: 1
Zachary: 8
Jackson: 7

It’s the cutest little bitty tooth. My itty bitty baby girl has a tooth!

I just re-read this and it is clear that I need an attitude adjustment. I need to get out of the house or something.

In the meantime, check out these photos of my cute babies. They make me happy. I should just keep looking at pictures tonight and get over myself.

Or maybe I should do some laundry.

Jackson and Daddy

Alexis and Daddy

Mommy and the trips #1

Mommy and the trips #2

Mommy and the trips #3

In the Truck

We really did enjoy our time at the party and it was wonderful seeing family friends.
You MUST see this cute video of our babies enjoying Luke's birthday cake! I love them so much it hurts. I could watch video of them all day long. But then, who would put away the laundry?

MARVEL at my amazing camerawork. Don't laugh, BTW. This was one handed.


Just before finishing this post, found out that Tuesday passed away today. My heart is broken. I cannot imagine the pain Tuesday's family is experiencing. Please join me in continuing to pray for Tuesday's family.