another late night update

Hi Everyone-

Per the doctor, Alexis is stable and improving. They continue to culture her blood every day. The cultures have shown that the staph is gone but there is still a yeast infection. She is on a very strong anti-fungal medication. She looks and acts worn out. She is using all of her energy to fight this stuff. Its just so devastating for a preemie to get any infection, and she has had so much medication running through her. I've just been trying to hold her tight and comfort her. She loves being held by her mommy. It breaks my heart that she is so sick and that I have to put her back in her incubator. I just want to hold her all day long and make her better.
Today they removed her PICC line to culture it and put in a new one. I am anxious to see the results of that culture and to see if that is the possible source of her infection. I can't wait until the day comes that she feels well and starts growing and thriving again.

Zachary continues to slowly get better. They have been increasing his feedings slowly and he now weighs 5lbs 2.7 oz. My big boy is really looking better everyday! I can't wait until he is all better so we can move even closer to bringing him home! He is a strong boy and had to fight the hardest at the beginning when they were born. I know he will use that strength to continue fighting and getting better.

Jackson took a big leap today as he started practicing feeding with a bottle! This is a big milestone that brings him so much closer to going home. He is learning to suck, swallow and breathe at the same time. This is something that full term babies already know how to do but for preemies, they need some training. It takes a lot of energy and he was exhausted afterward. Tonight I got to feed him myself (without the physical therapist) and I just LOVED watching him eat - it was so cute! It took a little time at first but he took all of it with no problems! No dip in heartrate and no apnea spells! What a big boy!!! He too has gained more weight and now weighs 5lbs 9 oz. He is starting to wear 't-shirts' now and they have lowered the temperature regulation of his incubator so he can start regulating his own temperature. Before you know it, he will be moved to a crib which is the next step before coming home! :)

Here are pics of Jackson at his 11pm feeding (yes, we are there THAT LATE):

Me feeding Jackson - I enjoyed this so much!

Jackson looking up at Mommy and trying to concentrate on drinking his milk

I am so proud of him for doing so well with his feeding!
Its tough, though, to have all three babies at such different stages. I hurt and worry for Alexis as she is so sick right now. I pray that Zachary gets better quickly and gets more energy to pull out of this slump. I celebrate Jackson's big success. Its tough feeling all these things at once. I don't want my feelings for any of my babies to take away from what is going on with another one. I already feel like I am being pulled in different directions. Its so strange that these three lived so close to each other inside of me and are now only feet away from each other in their own incubators but they are all doing so differently. I can't wait to take a baby home but I don't look forward to the feeling of having to leave the one(s) still in the NICU. I just have to pull myself back and remember that I can't control everything and that I have to keep it one day at a time. Until everyone is home, I just keep praying that God holds and comforts my babies when I am not there and I pray for the nurses and doctors to have wisdom and to take good care of my babies...just like they were their own children.

Please continue to pray. Thanks for loving my babies!
Much Love,
Cindy